Wednesday Words of Wisdom #131
This parenting craic is hard, man.
I mean, we knew it wasn’t going to be a cake walk, but this sh!t is tough.
The thing is, no one talks about how tough it really is.
Sure, they give you that all-knowing look and that sly dig before the baby comes and say stuff like, “We’ll see how you get on when the baby lands.” But no one addresses how challenging the situation really is.
And I’m not complaining for a second, I wouldn’t dream of it. We love Rose and we wouldn’t change anything about her. What I’m trying to do is to shed a little light and honesty and hopefully you’ll see where that approach will help you down the line.
3am, a screaming baby and a nappy that would put the willies up Charles Manson. This is it, this the moment that will finally break you.
You have no idea why she’s crying, you’re struggling to keep it together, change the nappy and not join her in screaming your lungs out. You’re panicking in case you miss any of the mess and she ends up with a rash. That would be your fault. You would have failed her. Maybe they’ll come and take her away from you. You might as well give up now. You’re never going to be able to do this. What were you thinking? How did you ever think that you could look after a baby, you can barely look after yourself. You are a terrible person. A terrible Father. Everyone else gets this parenting thing straight off the bat, or so they say. Everyone else’s babies don’t behave like this. They don’t cry at all. They sleep right through the night after drinking a gallon of milk and you can’t even get Rose to keep down an ounce.
So they say.
No one ever tells you their not-so-perfect stories.
No one ever tells you about the moments of crippling self doubt and abject fear.
No one tells you that this parenting thing is ridiculously hard work.
You knew it was going to be hard when you planned to have a baby but you had never heard anyone talk about how much they struggled.
All you ever hear are the overwhelming positives so when you struggle, you think there is something wrong with you.
Well, I’m here to set the record straight.
Parenting is the single toughest internship you will ever work. The hours are long (try never-ending). Your boss is a demanding little bundle of joy that frequently doesn’t actually know what s/he wants but has no qualms crying blue murder to get it anyway.The pay is non-existent, in fact, you pay for the privilege.
But it is a privilege.
And you must remember that.
You have been blessed with something so special. Something that others would give anything for.
A miracle.
So, you show up for ‘work’. Every day. Every night. And you do your best. No better. No worse.
You aren’t in competition and at times you will feel completely overwhelmed with it all.
It’s OK. You can do this. You were made to do this. It will be OK.
Look into those little eyes and remember the privilege you have been granted.
Your health is a privilege too.
Getting fitter and healthier is a privilege.
It’s another one of those privileges that’s hard work and that sometimes catches people out.
You start something with all the best will in the world and whenever the going gets tough, you throw the towel in, crying ‘foul play’ at the universe and ‘society’ and anyone else you can think to blame.
Remember the lesson we learned earlier.
Things can be tough but if they truly mean something to you, you will find a way to overcome your challenges.
And there’s another parallel to parenting too, in that no one ever talks about how hard it was for them to get in shape.
People avoid talking about their struggles because for some reason, hard work and perseverance isn’t ‘sexy’.
Or you have the flip side of the coin and they won’t stop talking about how hard it is for them. They talk so much about how difficult it is, they never actually set to work trying to get the job done.
Lets not get it twisted here folks, this thing we call fitness can be tough work and if you want big change then you better be ready to put in the graft but as in all things in life, you will get what you put in.
Remember the position you are in.
You are privileged, never forget that.
If you are reading this, it means you live in the ‘First World’. Your problems pale in significance to others. Nonetheless, they are yours and you must overcome them and you will if you just approach them with honesty from the outset.
Repeat after me, “Yes, this is hard work but it is so worth it and I am truly grateful to be in the position I am in.”
If it means something to you, you’ll find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse.
Now, go kick some ass Heroes.